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The women who care for UAE's children, leaving their own behind

Abu Dhabi - Female domestic workers in the UAE sacrifice everything for the sake of their little ones and families back home

Malini's day starts at 5am, when she wakes up to get the children ready for school. A housemaid for an Australian family in Abu Dhabi, she does her duties with meticulous care and attention. By the time, the school bus is at the gate, she would have bathed, dressed up and fed the two girls - aged five and six.
But far away in Sri Lanka, her own daughters Mini, 7 and Alka, 9 (named changed on request) wake up for school, sorely missing their mother's love and care. "My little girls have to do everything on their own. They are with their grandmother who is unwell. It aches my heart that I am not there for them," said Malini, 39.
She is one among the thousands of mothers in the UAE who were forced to leave their children behind to eke out a living by taking care of other people's kids. "I consider my employer's children as my own. But I always miss my girls. They keep asking why I cannot find work somewhere nearby," said Malini, who came to the UAE four years ago.
"My husband died five years ago and I could not manage on my own. I have to pay for his mother's treatment and also send my children to school. I am able to do all this because of my salary." Malini earns Dh2,000 a month, and she manages to save Dh400 and wire the rest of it to her family in Sri Lanka.
"I do want to go back home to my children before they become teenagers. I don't want to leave them alone at that age, and my mother-in-law's health is deteriorating. I hope to have saved enough by then," said Malini.
Ayesha's eyes well up and one can feel the lump in her throat when she talks about her daughter, whom she has not seen for seven years. "She is 13 now. When I left her and came to the UAE seven years ago, she was just five years old. She was crying inconsolably," said Ayesha, 32, from Bangladesh.
She is working as a part-time housemaid in Sharjah and babysits her employers' children. In the last seven years, Ayesha says she could never afford to buy an air ticket because of her responsibilities back home. "I have three elder members in my family, including my mother and two aunts, and I am the sole bread winner. Everything I earn here is spent on their hospital bills and to feed the family."
Ayesha said her husband abandoned her and took another wife. "Even when he was around, he never used to take care of my daughter. I had saved up some money and he ran away with that. I had to start from scratch."
She is worried for her teenage daughter as "there is no one to keep an eye on her." "I always tell her to keep away from trouble. When I talk to her over the phone, I still imagine her as a little girl. It is difficult to believe she is grown up. Years have just gone by without me seeing her and that makes me feel terrible. But I have no choice."
Ayesha said she is surviving in the hope that she will soon be able to see her daughter soon.
anjana@khaleejtimes.com

• Abu Dhabi