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Surround yourself with happy, confident people

You are where you are today because of the company you keep. This means if you want to evolve and grow you probably need to get rid of five people in your life to make room for five new influences.
Jim Rohn concluded: "You can only become the average of the five people you spend the most time with" and it makes sense if you consider the law of averages.
Whether you want to believe it or not, your relationships greatly influence you. The people you spend the most time with affect the way you see yourself and the world. They also influence your thoughts, your self-esteem and most importantly your leadership potential. Very often the box you have created around yourself, that is holding you back, is made up opinions, values, critique of those who surround you.
This box first started when you were a child and your parents started repeating things about you that you started believing such as 'He is shy!" or "She is not good with numbers!" Then you got to formal education and your teachers created another side of your box for you when they categorised you saying, "He is a B student!" or "She has problems focusing!" That was followed by your teenage years when your peers started influencing the way you see the world and yourself. This is where you potentially lost your way for the next few decades. And finally you became an adult and society, co-workers and life partners sealed the deal and put you into a box with all sides up. The worst part about all of this is you got comfortable in the box.
That infamous box is a figment of your imagination and it is not real. It is simply everyone else's expectations, and influence on you that you have comfortably accepted to wear as your daily under-garment.
Here's who is probably influencing you the most right now:
You. That's right. You can be your greatest cheerleader or your worst enemy. This is very scary for many of us. The way you talk to yourself and see yourself is one barrier that requires the most work.
The good thing is if you change your thoughts about yourself, you can change your life. By using the simple "mirror test" below when you are brushing your teeth, you can hold yourself accountable every morning. Ask yourself these three question every day over the next 30 days while looking into the mirror:
>Who will I become?
>What am I going to do today to get me closer to the person I want to be?
>What am I grateful for today?
>With time, you will start making the changes to improve your thoughts and behaviour.
Your parents. Yes they have been influencing you since you arrived and it has never stopped. Parents mean well as they groom you into becoming a better version of themselves and herein lies the problem. Your parents' belief system and views of the world is rooted in the baggage of their lives and those of their parents. Parents do have wisdom that can save us lots of heartaches. However, truth be told, there are some parents who believe in racism, sexism and scarcity. And their limiting beliefs may have impacted you and it is why you are where you are today. Your parents are the first persons you meet in the world so you have to give them some credit but make sure and inherit their strengths and not their weaknesses.
Your partner. As an adult, there is nobody as powerful as your partner whether you want to admit it or not. A positive partner is  one who compliments your weaknesses, supports you always, respects you and even dotes on you when you need it. A positive partner makes you want to be a better person and raise your standards. Make no mistake, your partner controls your life a lot. So set standards on how you want to feel around your partner and keep remembering we all have off days, even our partners.
Environment optimisation is key in choosing your new set of five people. If you want to be a happier human, spend more time with happy humans. If you want to be a confident human, spend more time with confident humans. You get the point. There is a reason lions only spend time with other lions and not sheep!
Sallyann Della Casa heads Growing Leaders Foundation, which brings 21st century skills to schools across the Mena region and Caribbean.