Dear therapist: The lack of mobility has driven me insane
A few years ago, an accident meant I was not able to walk any more and am currently wheelchair-bound. The lack of mobility has driven me insane, as I cannot help but feel it has come to a standstill. All the girls my age (I am 38) are not only married but also have children. Will life be forever like this? — Srishti Arya
Dear Srishti, I am very sorry to hear that you had such a bad accident that requires you to have a wheelchair to get around. I sincerely hope that with continued physical therapy and the new medical breakthroughs that are being developed, you will continue to make progress. Rehabilitation often is a tough and protracted process, so please remain positive that your hard work will pay off.
There are very few certainties in life. So we cannot predict how your life will unfold. What I do know is that you can make decisions in the here-and-now that can set the stage for a fulfilled and meaningful life.
Despite the wheelchair and uncertain prognosis you can participate in work, social, educational and recreational activities. You can continue to grow and enrich many areas of your life. There are many examples of wheelchair-bound people who have been successful in overcoming their circumstances. Some are famous people like Ruth Madeley, Tanni Gray-Thompson, and Christopher Reeve. Many others are not famous, but making significant contributions to society and living life to its fullest.
Chances are that you will meet someone with whom you click to form a meaningful relationship. Marriage between someone with a disability and a “still” able bodied person (we all are at risk for disability) are more common than you think.
Do not let the challenge of your disability get in the way of leading a fulfilled life. Don’t compare yourself to women who have what you want, but rather go out and seek your own path.