His mother hasn’t slept for days, says missing Sharjah teen’s father

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His mother hasn’t slept for days, says missing Sharjah teen’s father

15-year-old Mohammed Perwez 'ran away' from his home in Sharjah's Muhaisana.

by

Dhanusha Gokulan

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Published: Tue 16 Jul 2019, 8:00 PM

Last updated: Wed 17 Jul 2019, 1:38 PM

Friends and family members of the missing Indian teen boy are getting increasingly concerned for his safety. It's been 14 days since 15-year-old Mohammed Perwez "ran away" from his home in Sharjah's Muhaisana after reportedly being chided for watching YouTube videos way into the night.
Ramping up the search for the missing boy, the Sharjah Police have issued a tweet on Tuesday, appealing residents to inform the cops in case they spot Perwez. The police tweet said: "Sharjah Police General Headquarters urges the public if anybody has any information about the 15-year-old boy Mohammed Perwez, who has gone missing from his family's home since July 7, they should call 80040/ 065943210."
"He could be wearing either a blue T-shirt or a white kandoora," said the boy's father Mohammad Aftab Alam. He told Khaleej Times that his wife is in terrible trauma, and they are desperate to hear back from their son. "She has not slept or eaten for the past so many days. We filed the missing complaint on July 4. What will I do if something happens to him?" said a distraught Alam.
'Perwez is nice, jovial person'
Fourteen-year-old Ihsan Abdul Latif, Perwez's close friend and former school mate, said: "I saw him the last time a month ago. He was on his way to the prayers. A week before he went missing, he'd messaged me on the phone. As a person, he is very joyful. He looks always happy, tells jokes, and always makes us laugh. He is also a very kind and nice person. It's surprising that he has gone missing."  
Another friend 11-year-old Mohammed Rasal, a student of India International School, said Perwez has not once shown any signs of being depressed or upset. Rasal's mother Rasina Naseer said: "He is a very jovial boy, and my son and he always spoke to each other when they met at the mosque. We met his mother on Friday, and saw that she is in a very bad state."
Omar Imtiaz, close to the missing boy, said Perwez had gifted him a bracelet after returning from Umrah. Omar's mother Ayesha Imtiaz pointed out that the family are devout Muslims and they live in the same apartment building as hers. "They have been living here for two years, and I have never seen the parents be strict with the boy. Also, he (Perwez) is a very sweet boy and prays five times a day. When his family returned from Umrah, they got us dates and Zamzam water. He was very happy, and did not seem upset at all." Omar said Perwez would often play under their building and they went for Quran memorisation classes together.
'Communicate with kids, don't chide them'
Digital detox can help: Experts
Child psychologists and therapists suggest that parents should encourage their children to undergo digital detox during the summer holidays. Experts suggest being hooked to social media could often result in explosive and impulsive behaviour.
Mohammad Aftab Alam, father of Perwez who ran away from his home, had revealed that his son was watching a Hindi serial called 'Bharat ka Veer Putra- Maharana Pratap' when his mom found him on the phone at night. However, Perwez does not have a phone of his own. "His mother shouted at him for watching videos instead of sleeping."
Dr Mohammed Yousef, specialist psychiatrist, Aster Clinic, Al Muteena, said: "There are many reasons for children to act in this manner. They could be depressed, have problems at home, at school, and in some rare cases, there could also be drug dependency." He added: "Whatever be the situation, communicate with children with love, instead of scolding them. That's when they become angry, and act out."
Mehnaz Zafar, a psychiatrist with Al Amal Hospital and Al Qasimi Ministry Hospital, said experts are planning to classify internet and social media addiction as a "serious one". Children with addiction to social media sometimes depict explosive behaviour.
"Digital detox is recommended for school students. They can take some time off the screens. When parents see children exhibiting addictive behaviour, immediate attention should be given," she added. "During summer break, children do spend too much time on social media. Physiologically, they could suffer from headaches, fragmented sleep, and the child will have withdrawal symptoms when kept away from their phones or devices." The doctor suggested that addiction cannot be managed by suddenly stopping it. "Kids need to taper it down, especially if it is something they have been indulging in for a long period of time," she added.
When Your Runaway Teen Child Comes Back
1-Take a break from each other.
Do not start talking about it right away. Your emotions are too high at this point to get anywhere in a conversation. Go two separate directions until you both have gotten some rest.
2-Ask and Listen
Why did they leave? You may want to evaluate a rule or two after speaking with them, but do not do so while having this talk. Tell them you are willing to think about it, and you will let them know.
3-Initiate Talk
Tell them how you felt about them going, let them know that they hurt you by leaving. Let them know that there isn't a problem that together you can't solve. If they ever feel that running away might solve something, have them talk to you first, you could always offer other choices so they can make a better decision.
4-Get some help
If this isn't the first time or you have problems communicating when they get back, it's time to ask for help. There could be a person that your child respects, i.e. aunt or uncle. Or you may want to seek professional help.
dhanusha@khaleejtimes.com
 
 


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