Trump is more a media gimmick than presidential material
In fact there are websites devoted to him: at TrumpDonald.org you can blow a trumpet at his head and make his weird hair fly (yes, this has been done 109 million times, according to the site's counter); and at drumpulous.itch.io you can even shoot women's sex toys at his head.
Donald Trump may not become president of the United States but he already lords over the Internet. You can't escape him in the cyber-verse; you'd need an entire Wikipedia (a Trumpopedia, perhaps) to catalogue all the matter he's generated. Besides the million-and-one psych analyses and news features, and the unending memes popping up on the geriatric social media site facebook, there are countless videos devoted to Trump. In fact there are websites devoted to him: at TrumpDonald.org you can blow a trumpet at his head and make his weird hair fly (yes, this has been done 109 million times, according to the site's counter); and at drumpulous.itch.io you can even shoot women's sex toys at his head.
Everyday a Trump video is posted - and not just of his rallies or of his appearances on TV news or even of skits about him on late-night TV comedy shows (like John Oliver's discovery that Trump's ancestral name is Drumpf, or where a thrice-married "Trump" scours Conan O'Brien's audience for a future ex-Mrs Trump). Just Google "Trump hair" and check out the number of entries. And this is before the main face-off with likely Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton. The Donald is Yuge! Here are some highlights:
The brilliant Evan Puschak is on YouTube as nerdwriter1 and on Tumblr as thenerdwriter, and he vlogs on culture. So it's no surprise that nredwriter1 was ahead of the curve when, in September 2015, he vlogged on Why Donald Trump is a gift to democracy, saying that Trump "strips away the false righteousness of the media... the politicians... and us, the American public". More fascinating, however, is Nerdwriter1's December video, How Donald Trump Answers a Question. This visual analysis of Trump-speak is eye-opening (and scary, too). Others have picked up on his theme, but on this nerdwriter1 remains the definitive voice.
YouTube's Wisecrack channel has a slick video, Is Trump the END of Politics?, a post-modern analysis of Trump, "tabloid realism", news-as-entertainment, and false news as click-bait. It also features French philosophers like Guy Debord and Francois Debrix, who would otherwise be daunting and incomprehensible to the rest of humanity. For instance, ponder over Debord's declaration: "In a topsy-turvy world, the truth is a moment of the false." To a newsman, this makes perfect sense.
You'll look over your shoulder while watching 5 Secret Conspiracies to Stop Donald Trump on Dark5, a YouTube channel dedicated to, yes, paranoid conspiracies. This early-March video suggests that the Republican establishment, horrified that Trump may become their standard-bearer, is plotting alternatives: "Koch Block" says the billionaire brothers are planning a media assault on The Donald; "Elect Hillary" says the Republican establishment may even vote for her to stop Trump. Dark5 posted a vlog in February, 5 Darkest Donald Trump Secrets, most of which arent't secrets anymore thanks to negative campaigning. It contains two items of interest: the inappropriate things Trump has said about foxy daughter Ivanka, and his suppression 25 years ago of the documentary, What's the Deal?, whose allegations include one about an attempt to buy boxer Mike Tyson.
Famous linguist, philosopher and radical activist Noam Chomsky has a YouTube channel, Chomsky's Philosophy, dedicated to him that features If Trump Becomes President. The lucid insights and logical arguments begin with "the human species is in deep trouble", and six minutes later ends with the sinister "his main competitor Ted Cruz is even more dangerous". Chilling.
For comic relief, check out Hulu's video Donald Trump Supporters Interviewed by Triumph the Comic Insult Dog. "Triumph" is actually a rude, nasty hand-puppet, and this dog always has a cigar. In short, he's hilarious (he was a long-running skit on Conan's show but has now gone solo). Here, Triumph visits Iowa and has fun with middle America. It is ROFL and LMAO and you will be in tears.
There's a video of an edgy skit that can't be to everyone's taste: Adolf Hitler Hates Being Compared to Trump. The wry, no-holds-barred comedienne Sarah Silverman portrays the single-testicled Nazi dictator who claims to be offended by comparisons to Trump. It is risqué and leaves the studio audience giggling nervously; but it is definitely ticklish. It proves that no matter how impervious Trump may seem to becoming the butt of jokes, the world of comedy just never gives up.
Finally, the animated TV show The Simpsons that has been on-air for more than a quarter of a century predicted a Trump presidency back in a show televised in 2000; clips of it are now all over YouTube and Tumblr. In that episode, Bart Simpson is given glimpses of the future; in the year 2030, sister Lisa is US President and is trying to clean up after her predecessor President Trump, who not only bankrupted the country but also took handouts from China (in contrast to his current rhetoric on the campaign trail). Trump has over the decades been in movies and on TV, but here is another instance of truth being stranger than fiction.
And to think, we still have over seven more months of #MakingTheInternetGreatAgain. Thank you, Darth Trump, Lord Sith of the Internet!
Aditya Sinha is a senior journalist and writer. He is a contributor to the upcoming anthology, 'House Spirit: Drinking in India'
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