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Need to elect butchers

Eid Al Adha comes every year to remind us the importance of the butcher. This year too the occasion was marked by a nationwide hunt for skilled butchers who could complete the job at a minimum cost, Mr Right smiled.

“Experience has shown that it is easier to find the right animal than a proper butcher to make the ritual less painful for the animal and its owner,” I said. “Usually, anybody who has a rusted knife at home is tempted to go on a house-to-house slaughter spree to earn some money.”

“This is allowed only in our country,” Mr Right said. “In more civilised societies, only experienced and 
well-trained persons who are professional butchers are expected to slaughter an animal. We need to rectify this system.”

“I agree, we need good butchers to do the job even if their exorbitant charges make the owners of 
animals feel as if they themselves have been skinned instead of their animals,” I said.

“Butchers should also be trained and registered at a proper government department,” Mr Right suggested. “They should not be allowed to practise their trade without proper training like politicians.”

“Although the nature of their jobs is the same, but the butchers unlike politicians make sure that others also have something to eat,” I said. “That’s why I think they are more people-friendly.”

“I believe their skills could be utilised by people in a better way if they are also made part of the great drive for a social revolution currently being promoted by some of our leaders, including the heart-throb of the youth, Imran Khan,” Mr Right stressed.

“What do you mean?” I asked. 
“Can a butcher become a leader of 
the people?”

“There have been many examples in history and also in world politics,” Mr Right explained. “But I’m not saying the practice should be replicated in our country, too.

I simply want them to have a people-friendly role in society. In any case they are more professional and skilled than the politicians.”

“But how can it be done?” I looked at him inquiringly.

“By giving them more respect and placing them in positions of authority otherwise they will continue to sneak into other professions promising more money,” Mr Right said.

“But who would do this?” I asked.

“Imran Khan is a man of ideas and he could find a way to include them in his grand plan of social change,” Mr Right elaborated. “He intends to recruit area police officers through elections. Butchers should also be elected to strengthen democracy.”

I was thrilled. “A great suggestion indeed,” I said. “Imran Khan is looking for persons who know their job and are ready to work for the betterment of society.

Butchers could be elected at the city, district and division levels. 
The system will create a foolproof arrangement for a reliable supply of skilled butchers on all religious and national occasions.”

“Elected butchers will be more reliable and less expensive,” I said. “They might also develop a cooperative livestock market on the lines of utility stores to provide animals to their voters at reasonable rates. They will certainly keep their voters happy and well-fed.”

“And they will keep their constituencies crime-free and peaceful too,” I continued. “If elevated to parliament, they could even force 
the foul-mouthed members to behave and maintain decorum during the session because they always remain well-equipped.”

“Don’t tell Imran Khan, otherwise he might decide to elect all the 
butchers as area police chiefs,” 
Mr Right remarked.

Najmul Hasan Rizvi is a former Assistant Editor of Khaleej Times