Musings and memories

Filed on November 22, 2019

Last week's issue (Nov 15) revealed a salient truth about growing up and atavisms. I felt this threefold through the columns The Last Word; Singles, who? Make way for the self-partnered; and Life's Like That. Each represented my past, present and future.
As a young adult who's been married for almost a year now, Vohra's take on the third innings of life - becoming a grandparent - was peppered with what it means to be a child. I couldn't help but smile as I remembered my grandparents and how they would indulge me. I found myself wondering where my own sense of fun and laughter had gone and that brought me to the other two articles.
Pattali's piece on the struggles of living out one's dreams was a sobering reality check. Chatterjee's article on staying single despite the pressure of the 'm' word reminded me of old friends who swore off marriage only to give in at last. The general romanticism aside, I find it really fascinating to see how people change throughout the course of their lives, and marriage is often a massive catalyst for that. In fact, change is truly the only constant in life.

Ankita Gupta

Generational love
Last Word (Nov 15) by Bikram Vohra was a truly exuberant read. It's a blessing to have grandparents and I've been lucky to witness four generations together. They hold a unique position in my family with their unconditional love and careful attention to nurture grandchildren. With the ability to put themselves in other people's shoes, they respond with kindness and acceptance.
I am humbled to have known my grandparents, as they are examples of lives filled with love, sacrifice and strength. They have safeguarded the stories that built bridges for multiple generations and it is because of them that I know who I am connected to. I would encourage everyone to stay connected to their roots with an attitude of respect and forgiveness for a healthier family system.
Malika Kapoor, by email

Triggering change
Times are changing - slowly, but steadily. The discovery of the term 'self-partnered'(Singles, who? Make way for the self-partnered, Nov 15) would be quite liberating to those who are single and struggling to survive, in this world dictated by societal norms.
This article reminds me of a friend who was married for a year. After she realised that her marriage was pulling her into a life that was suffocating, she decided to break free, despite relentless pressure from her family. 'How will she manage alone?', they wondered. Needless to say, she is a happy soul today. Our mantra ought to be - 'do not bow down to the idea of how  life should be, based on the sketches drawn by others'.
The right to decide whether to have kids, or how many, or even whether or not to get hitched should be a personal decision. The individuals featured in this article have rightly taken a stand. The new terminology around this ideology will surely trigger a shift in the mindset of society, so that, hopefully, we don't judge others by the choices they make.
Swapna N., by email

Stay positive
The article Crowning Glory (Nov 15) opens a door for those who wish to turn feelings of victimhood into empowerment and self-mastery, and disease into health. Sometimes you've got to go down to get back up. Being positive is the best medicine you can take. Enjoy every day without worrying about the next.
Rashida Mansoor, by email

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