Dear Therapist: How should I deal with a narcissist?

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By Prateeksha Shetty

Published: Wed 1 Dec 2021, 7:27 PM

I don’t get along with my sister’s boyfriend. I think she’s way too smart and talented to be going out with a guy like him and it makes me resentful towards him. He’s a narcissist with no stable income, whereas she earns good money and I feel like he’s using that to his advantage. — Dima A.

Dear Dima, I understand that you are concerned about your sister and that you believe that she is being taken for a ride! You may feel protective about her and may see more flaws in her boyfriend than might be true. It is also quite possible that your judgement is accurate and that he may, in fact, be a narcissist. You can approach your sister and discuss your doubts about the person, but you must also recognise the possibility of not being believed, or even worse, damage your relationship with her. Moreover, you may not be aware of the dynamics within the relationship or its nature. You can warn her of the red flags but its acknowledgement is purely upto her. The only outcome you can control is the space and support that you provide for your sister.


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