What not to say to someone considering divorce
Avoid words like “everything heals with time” or “work it out” as they can definitely do without them.
Published: Thu 18 Sept 2014, 10:02 AM
Updated: Sat 4 Apr 2015, 4:33 AM
- The worst thing you can do is suggest they can “work it out” with their spouse. That’s not always the case and they’re probably already past that stage.
- “Everything heals with time” is the most frustrating advice of all. It makes you feel like there’s some sort of timetable for feeling better and moving on after a split and there really isn’t.
- Don’t say “You’re so strong! You’ll get over this and move on”.
- Telling them that “you’re confident their former spouse will protect them financially” is a bad idea. Unfortunately, that’s a rarity.
- Don’t pass judgement or exhaust the person with questions, just shut up and listen. They’ll make the decision they need to make when they’re ready.
- “Stay, no matter what”, would have to be the worst advice.
- Don’t tell them they’ll be so much happier after the divorce. You can’t be sure of that.