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UAE-based author explains why beauty isn’t something to fix
In her new book 'Simply Beautiful', Mercy Nyamanhindi Kwaramba challenges perfection culture and celebrates authenticity
- PUBLISHED: Mon 19 Jan 2026, 1:40 PM UPDATED: Mon 19 Jan 2026, 9:34 PM
In an age of filters and endlessly shifting beauty standards, Mercy Nyamanhindi Kwaramba is asking readers to pause, and look inward. The author, grief advocate, and psychological counselling graduate has built her work around one central truth: that authenticity is not something to achieve, but something to return to. Her latest book, Simply Beautiful, is a deeply personal reflection on self-worth, identity, and the courage it takes to stop performing for the world.
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Living and publishing in the UAE, Mercy draws from her own life experiences — from loss and healing to cultural diversity and self-actualisation — to challenge narrow definitions of beauty and offer a gentler, more honest way forward. In a conversation with Khaleej Times, she speaks about grief, scars, self-acceptance, and why being “enough” was never something to be earned in the first place.
'Simply Beautiful' opens with the idea that the book is not a manual but a mirror. Since the book is inspired by your personal experiences, what moment in your life made you realise you were ready to stop ‘fixing’ yourself and start truly seeing yourself?
There wasn’t one dramatic moment; it was a quiet awakening. As we grew up, my parents played a significant role in shaping this mindset. They taught my siblings and me not to focus only on outward appearance. In our home, the question of who is beautiful was never a topic. Beauty was not something ranked, compared, or debated; it simply wasn’t the measure of value.
As I grew older and continued to develop myself, I began to realise that there is far more to life and to a person than their outward appearance or the opinions others hold about them. Over time, I reached what I would call a moment of self-actualisation. A point where I stopped giving energy to things that are not truly important and started focusing inward on growth, purpose and becoming the best version of myself.
That shift made me see myself clearly. I realised I was unique in my own way, with all my imperfections, experiences and stories. I stopped trying to fix myself because I finally understood that I was never broken. I just needed to see myself for who I truly was.
You’ve written openly about grief, loss, and self-love across your work. How did your personal experiences shape the emotional aspects of this book?
Grief strips you of all pretence. It teaches you that life is fragile, time is precious and appearances mean very little when the heart is hurting. Through loss, I learned to sit with myself honestly without masks, without performance. That depth of honesty shaped this book. Simply Beautiful carries emotion because it was written from lived experience, not theory. It understands pain, healing and the courage it takes to love yourself again after life reshapes you.
In a world dominated by filters and trends, what does ‘beauty’ mean to you today, and how has that definition evolved over time?
Beauty to me now means authenticity, the courage to show up as your true self every day. It goes far beyond looks or the image reflected in the mirror. Beauty is found when you dig deeper, open up all the layers and reconnect with who you truly are at your core.
When you reach that place, you begin to embrace what makes you different. You no longer hide your scars; you honour them as part of your story. Your experiences, journey and truths become sources of strength rather than things to conceal. And from that place of acceptance, self-love naturally follows.
What has been encouraging to witness is that more and more people are beginning to embrace who they are. As a Black African woman, I see this clearly, more women are confidently showing up in their natural hair, without extensions or wigs and celebrating natural hairstyles that honour our heritage and identity. This shift speaks to a deeper awakening and a growing comfort with authenticity.
Over time, I believe the definition of beauty has evolved from something external and influenced by trends to something internal and grounded. Trends fade, and filters disappear, but truth remains. Today, I see beauty as authenticity lived daily honest, rooted and deeply freeing.
Your academic background spans business and psychological counselling. How do these disciplines influence the way you write?
They help me balance depth and structure. My background in business taught me clarity, focus and intentionality, the importance of communicating a message with purpose. Psychological counselling, on the other hand, allows me to understand the emotional layers of the human experience: how people feel, process pain, heal and make meaning of their lives.
Because of this, I’m always conscious that words carry weight. They can either comfort or wound, open space or close it. So, I write intentionally to affirm rather than overwhelm, to gently guide rather than instruct. My aim is for readers to feel seen and supported, not examined or judged.
The book encourages readers to embrace their scars without apology. Why do you think so many people — especially women — struggle to believe they are enough as they are?
Many people especially women struggle to believe they are enough because, from a very young age, they are taught indirectly and repeatedly that other people’s opinions matter, particularly men’s opinions. Beauty is often presented as currency: if you are considered beautiful, you are more desired, more chosen, more valued. And if you are not, the message, subtle but persistent, is that life, love and partnership will somehow be harder to attain.
As a result, many women grow up feeling the need to make an extra effort to be seen, accepted, or chosen. They become overly concerned with how they are perceived, constantly measuring themselves against external standards. This pressure often leads to pretending hiding parts of who they are, covering scars and presenting a “perfect” version of themselves in order to fit in. There is a deep fear that showing flaws or scars might mean rejection.
At the core of this struggle is a belief that worth is conditional. From a young age, many women are taught subtly and repeatedly that their value depends on beauty, behaviour, success, or approval. Scars disrupt that narrative. They tell a story of survival, not perfection. Embracing scars means rejecting unrealistic standards, and that can feel uncomfortable in a world that rewards polish over truth.
But scars are not signs of weakness. They are evidence of life lived, lessons learned and resilience built. Simply Beautiful encourages women to stop apologising for their stories and to understand that being enough was never something to be earned; it was always there.
As someone living and publishing in the UAE, how do you see conversations around beauty, self-worth, and authenticity shifting in this region? What made you come up with a book now?
Living and publishing in the UAE has given me a very unique perspective on beauty, self-worth and authenticity because this region is incredibly diverse. Here, people from different cultures, nationalities and races coexist, and with that diversity comes different definitions of beauty. What is considered beautiful in one culture may be completely different in another. This has naturally opened up conversations that move away from a single standard and toward embracing our differences a shift that I believe is already happening.
Working in an environment with over 45 nationalities has reinforced this for me. It is a daily reminder that beauty has no universal definition. What is universal, however, is the need to understand your self-worth and to show up authentically as who you are. These are values that transcend culture, language, and background.
I felt compelled to write Simply Beautiful now because of the growing influence of social media. We are constantly being presented with new definitions of what beauty should look like, creating pressure to keep up with trends, appearances and comparisons. People are doing more and more in an attempt to feel beautiful, and this pressure is no longer limited to adults; it is affecting children, too. Yet, even after all the effort, many are left feeling unsatisfied and still not enough.
That is where authenticity becomes essential. When people learn to embrace who they are, they become comfortable in their own skin. Despite the noise, the trends, and the external opinions, they remain grounded in their self-worth. Simply Beautiful was written to support this shift, to help people return to themselves, celebrate their differences and understand that their value is not defined by trends, but by truth.
If a reader finishes 'Simply Beautiful', what is that one takeaway you hope stays with them long after?
You are enough when you are being your true self.
More than anything, I hope the book leaves them feeling at peace with who they are confident in their worth, grounded in their truth and free to show up in the world without apology.
