Top 4 things I have learnt as a new dad

You are released back into normality with the expectation that nothing has changed... but it has. Massively.

By Nicholas Bettles

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Published: Wed 8 Jan 2020, 6:00 PM

Last updated: Wed 8 Jan 2020, 8:50 PM

I am a new dad back at work, and here are the top four things I have learnt.
This is hard. Everyone tells you it's going to be tough; "life will never be the same again" they say, "enjoy living on no sleep" they deliver with a wry smile - sure they can say those things, but until you are truly faced with the realities of a having to hold another human and worry about not dropping them do you realise that everyone was 100 per cent correct! Throwing a new baby into the mix and having to head back to work after two weeks paternity is the adult equivalent of realising you have a Senior School French oral test the same day as your written and listening exams and you haven't even said more than a bonjour in six months - basically you're up the creek! In all honesty it's a bitter-sweet feeling. You are released back into normality with the expectation that nothing has changed... but it has. Massively.
5am is the new power hour. The unexpected upside of being woken up five times a night is that when the 5am siren goes off it's actually acceptable to go downstairs, put the kettle on and make a brew. From there, you can start the day - bust out a few emails or get cracking on that piece of work that you should have done the day before. Whatever you choose to do, it's an extra hour that most of us never had before - make the most of it.
Make time for things that matter. My personal favourite has become bath time - at 1800 every evening we give Avery a bath, get her ready for bed, and generally just sing daft songs to her. Having a baby basically gives you a good reason to stop your emails, schedule calls differently and put a stop to everything else to prioritise your new #1.
However, you feel know your partner is having it twice as hard. Possibly the biggest trap to fall into as a new dad is to utter the words, 'I've had a tough day at work, I need to chill', as soon as you walk through the door. True, your day may have been crap - but, don't forget you are not the one who has literally scooped up the said crap and pee all day from a screaming fart machine. Dealing with that for 10 hours straight is the real hard work. It's important to find a balance between you and your partner - find time to give yourselves both a break, but just don't call one job harder than the other (trust me on this!)
My advice to anyone who sees a new dad back at work... go buy him a large Americano, straight up! He will appreciate it!
-LinkedIn
Nicholas Bettles is the Commercial Manager - Israel at Virgin Atlantic


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