Honesty is the best policy. Except when it isn't

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Honesty is the best policy. Except when it isnt

Can camouflaging the truth be a better option than brutal honesty in select cases?

By Vicky Kapur (From the Executive Editor's desk)

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Published: Sun 21 Apr 2019, 8:00 PM

Last updated: Mon 22 Apr 2019, 6:08 PM

Disclaimer: This isn't a lecture in moral education - just some practical reflections. With that out of the way, let me begin with asking you this: Was I wrong to tell my eight-year-old daughter that the purple sneakers she received as a birthday gift from her best friend looked great even though I actually felt that they were awful? They say it isn't the worst thing to lie if it isn't selfish.
It was, of course, selfish of me to have lied. I fibbed to my daughter so I don't break her heart. She really adores her bestie who told her that she spent a good part of the previous weekend scouting for that 'perfect' footwear for her. I just couldn't tell her my real feelings about the shoe, now could I? So was I wrong?
In certain cases, lying or camouflaging the truth may turn out to be as good or even better. You don't tell your protégé in as many words that you think that she or he sucks at making PowerPoint presentations. Instead, you tell them that now that they've got the content right, they must work on the design aspect of the presentation. That's constructive and, therefore, an accepted practice in the modern workplace.
Another situation where you don't blurt out what's on your mind is before special occasions. Your spouse is off for that dream job interview and asks you what do you think of his chances. It's a job that hundreds if not thousands would have applied for, and the list for the preliminary interview itself would run into dozens if not scores. Yes, his chances may be slim, but it may not be the best time to get into permutations and combinations. You tell him that he'll be wonderful and that you believe that he'll floor the interview panel. It remains a thin line, though. Don't lie simply because it is convenient to do so or because you aren't ready to deal with the repercussions of honest feedback. Honesty is the best policy - and remains so in this post-truth era - but as William Blake put it, a truth that's told with bad intent beats all the lies you can invent.


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