It's just... a little crush

Its just... a little crush

A teenager wonders if it's worth spending time obsessing over celebrities



By KT reader Neena Mary Varghese

Published: Sat 26 Mar 2016, 9:33 AM

Last updated: Sun 27 Mar 2016, 7:55 PM

Exams finished recently and I, being an introvert, decided to spend my day browsing the internet and eating ice cream. So I went to YouTube. I remembered that my best friend had told me to not watch a particular video, so obviously, I did. Oh man, I'm so regretting it.
A celebrity I currently have a crush on was in that video, so I did what any girl obsessed would do - Google images. Unfortunately for me, my eyes landed on all the people he had dated. The bottom line is that they were beautiful, thin, successful - and I am well, the opposite of all those adjectives.
So I thought, why bother? Why swoon over a guy or a girl or anyone famous, you know you will never get to meet? They will never know you and if, by any chance, you do meet them, let's face it, they will forget you (I'm sorry, I had to be blunt). You would be just one of those many people who have a huge crush on them. It doesn't matter if you are crazy about Daniel Radcliffe, Robert Pattinson, Ian Somerhalder, Jack Falahee etc. We are all the same. I am not known for my self control so I went to Google to create more heartache for myself and I realise every freaking time - I CANNOT be them. I mean, yes, maybe I can be a famous actor when I am - I don't know - 30 plus? But I can't be them. Come on, all those women will get all that we are dreaming about, but we won't because obviously because by the time we reach their position they'll be too old and we will have self-respect if not self-control.
So just ask that question in a general sense, why on earth do we obsess over a bunch of people that will never know us? Even if they produce good music, why obsess? In sociology class, we studied a topic called culture. We have cultures and then we have sub-cultures - a culture within a culture. So basically we are all part of fan culture - yes, our love and numbers have become so big we have created our own culture. I searched online about this and well, adults have their own theory. This is what I got from an article in the New York Post:  "Thanks to emerging adolescent brain research, we are learning that many reckless, erratic, downright befuddling types of teen behaviour (twerking, etc.) might have more to do with their not-yet-fully mature brains than just bad parenting.
"Many types of behaviour once chalked up to hormones, immaturity, laziness and over-coddling are rooted in our adapting brain chemistry and structure. For example, the prefrontal cortex, the master control center of the mind, doesn't fully mature until our mid-20s."
Yes, they actually researched our biology to explain our insanity. Parents and everyone else are that clueless. Well, we all have our own reasons to be in love with a celebrity or high-profile person. My reason - this person is everything I want in a man. He is the definition of perfection. He's good at everything. I could search my entire life and not find someone else like him.
But see, that's the thing, we have looked up for so long that we fail to look around us. We fail to see the perfect imperfections of the people around us that makes them the amazing people they are. We keep wasting our time comparing those amazing people to celebrities. We lose sight of those qualities that make them special.
I know because I am guilty of it and without a shadow of a doubt I can say that it's not just me. It's not fair to all the three parties. It's not our fault that celebrities show only their perfect side; it's not the celebrities fault that we have a huge crush on them [who am I kidding? Of course it is]. and it's not their fault that we have unrealistic expectations and standards about the perfect man.
You can obsess about celebrities all you want but don't forget to notice those people who want to make you feel special and cherished and want to put you in the limelight of their life. Give them the chance and attention they deserve and you know they'll shower you with more.
Trust me, when you do, you will be glad that you did. Saying that, I am here telling myself to stop clicking on the next episode of my favourite TV show that features my celebrity crush, so that I can do other things, knowing very well that I'm going to end up binge watching - big time.

City Times reader Neena Mary Varghese is a Grade 12 student at the Indian High School, Dubai.


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