Dubai-based consultant, leadership trainer and motivational speaker Carol Talbot believes we need to step out of our comfort zone and take more chances
“I LOVE it here,” says Carol Talbot, musing on Dubai as we begin the interview. Her vivacious optimism and energy are infectious as she chats to City Times about her latest project — her book ‘Hitting The Wall... and Breaking Through’, and other subjects close to her heart.
Tell us a bit about your book 'Hitting The Wall... and breaking through!'
In a nutshell, it's about the times in your life when you think you're going round in circles. You don't seem to be getting anywhere, or you seem to have hit a block, a barrier, a wall. I'm a great believer in one size doesn't fit all, no matter how stretchy the fabric, so I give you in the book a choice, of going on a journey where you can either dig a little bit deeper and tunnel your way under the wall to find out what motivates you, what drives you, or you can break though the wall, breaking through your limiting beliefs, or you can climb over the wall, take a peek and see what's on the other side, to reach a garden of opportunity. There in the garden of opportunity you can understand if you've ever created success in the past, how you did that and what's your strategy for success, so you can use it again and again. So my philosophy is you can use one of those three techniques or all three techniques to get you through those difficult times in your life.
So writing a book... was it something that just came to you on the spur of the moment? Or did you think about it for a while, that 'I want to write a book?'
To be honest, I never thought there was a book in me. I didn't think I had the focus and the dedication to sit down and write a book. But it was an idea, and the title came to me probably about two years ago, when I'd hit a brick wall myself. I came across a particular person who was a book coach and she gave me a lot of great advice, particularly on the preparation and structure and I decided just to go for it. So I had a lot of support and it was surprisingly easy. I actually started this book in April; it was complete by June and it's already been out for a month or so. I think writing a book is a very cathartic experience for the author. Whether or not anyone else wants to read it, it was a sense of achievement for me and I guess broke through a lot of brick walls for me about what was and wasn't possible.
As a consultant what is it exactly that you do?
I do a lot of motivational speaking; I'm a leadership trainer. I do a lot of work with Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP). My company, Matrix Training Solutions, has a lot of different programmes for organisations as well as individuals. We run NLP Practitioner, Master Practitioner Certification Programmes, Time Line Therapy, Hypnosis. I'm a Master Firewalking Instructor so I teach people to walk across fire and break boards, arrows... and it's not just about the fire. It's not about breaking through wood or breaking arrows. It's really about breaking your mental mindset about what is and isn't possible.
Could you explain the concept of NLP?
It's a model of excellence. Let me put this simply — it started with a question. How come some people are winners and some people are not? What's that difference that makes the difference? NLP studies that difference; it studies excellence. It looks at the best people around the world and asks, not just what they do, but how they do it, what's going on inside, what beliefs do they have, what values, what pictures do they make inside their heads, what sounds, what feelings. It's like watching a famous sportsperson and you know, they have their little rituals when they're doing that 'perfect shot' — it studies how do they do that, so you can install that in yourself.
You mention in your book ‘we sit safely in our own comfort zone.’ Do you believe this is true of most people? Is complacency dangerous? Is taking less chances an obstacle to personal and professional growth?
Yes and no. The human potential is to grow. For those people with kids you only have to look at young children – who learn to walk, talk, read, write by modelling adults in a very short space of time. As adults we still learn and grow because everything on the planet is either learning or dying. So if you’re not growing you’re dying. However, we do get sort of settled into a comfort zone, and sometimes it’s only when we hit those blocks and barriers and go around in circles that we venture out of this zone. You know I’ve recently moved house, and I’ve placed the furniture very similar to how it was placed in my last house. So immediately I felt comfortable... there are certain areas in our life where we want things to be the same. People resist change but with change you find you’re more than you thought you could be. So, yes, stepping out of our comfort zone is a big thing for a lot of people and yet I think we have to every day in Dubai, considering the growth and development here. If you don’t grow, your company can no longer find use for you.
Could you tell us something about hypnosis and Time Line therapy and how they can help people?
One of the funniest things that people say to you when you tell them you’re a trainer of hypnosis is, ‘Oh, can you hypnotise me?’ And I say no, because all hypnosis is self-hypnosis. All we’re doing with hypnosis is helping the client get in touch with their own resources, in other words having a deeper level of rapport with their own unconscious mind, tapping into that wisdom, without interference from their conscious mind. What happens is your conscious mind is constantly analysing, criticising, judging everything that’s going on. Time line therapy is again another tool for personal development. It’s a very quick and useful and easy tool for eliminating negative emotions and limiting decisions that stop you achieving your goal. It works on the premise that most emotions, actually all emotions are linked to time. So if you think about it, anxiety is an emotion of the future. You can’t be anxious about something that has happened, you’re anxious about something that will happen. And anxiety is just a warning from the unconscious mind that you’re not paying attention to what you want. So lets say, you’re anxious about a presentation that you’ve got to do. If you were focusing on what you want, you’d be focusing on that presentation going well. If you’re focusing on what you don’t want you’re focusing on the presentation going badly.
You’re a Master Firewalk Instructor. Could you tell us something more about the firewalk, exactly what it involves and how it helps people?
As I said to you earlier, it’s not really about the fire. It’s not about the burning hot coals...
So are you actually walking on fire?
Oh yes.
Barefoot?
Yes. Well if you use your shoes, they’ll burn! But your feet don’t! It’s one of those phenomena, it’s not about the fire, the boards or anything like that, it's about breaking through limiting beliefs. The firewalk is probably one of the oldest traditions we have around the globe. It's been practised in virtually every culture, every religion, for health, healing, empowerment.
But one has to be prepared mentally before they walk across.
That’s part of what I do. We prepare people mentally. Mind, body and spirit. We help them raise their energy and there’s different ways of doing it. Again in a corporate one, I may use their message within their company if a sales team has been given a huge target, and they don’t believe they can reach that target, this is a great enhancer to help them break through that limiting belief about what is and isn’t possible. For individuals, particularly now that we’re coming to the end of the year, it’s a great way to cleanse the past and think about how you can go forward. With the public firewalks we take a slightly different viewpoint, a softer approach. Another way of looking at it is that the body, as we know from Chinese medicine is reflected on the base of the feet through reflexology so what you’re actually doing is taking that energy through your body and cleansing your body. So if you think about it, that’s what its all about. So some people may feel a little bit of heat, a lot of people feel nothing at all. But that’s just the energy moving through you. It’s such a high when you look back and think, gosh, I did that. I have to say I was blessed to work with one of the most beautiful women I have ever met, Peggy Dillon, she’s often referred to as the ‘Mother’ of the Western Firewalking Movement. I’d encourage everyone out there to experience it and I’d also say I’d never force anyone to do the walk because it's one of those things that I think when the time is right, you will.
How many years have you spent in Dubai and how do you feel about Dubai’s rapid growth as a city?
I’ve been here about 17 years and I love it here. You’d probably have to kick me out! I think there are great opportunities here; the growth is very impressive. I think our Ruler’s vision for Dubai has been incredible. One of my best memories here was going into the year 2000, with a group of friends we went into the desert on Christmas eve and we watched the sun go down and as we did there was a caravan of camels going past. And I thought, wow, if that’s not nearer the Christmas story than anything else I don’t know what is!
Do you have any favourite inspirational books? You’ve mentioned Richard Bach’s Illusions in your list of references in 'Hitting the Wall... and breaking through!'
I love Richard Bach’s books. There are gems in every single page of Illusions. I love quotes, which is why I’ve put quotes in my book. I also like Jonathan Livingston Seagull, which was made into a movie of being more than you thought you could be... he didn’t just want to be a seagull!
Is your book available in local bookstores?
It will be very soon. Right now it’s available on www.amazon.com and www.amazon.co.uk. One can also follow the link on our website, which is www.matrix-training.com