The 2016 MINI Clubman: Baby Got Back!

The last MINI Clubman was diagnosed with a dysfunctional rear door system and peculiar styling. So, for 2016, MINI is here to undo those wrongs

The 3-door MINI is a famed hatchback with history spanning 50 years and certainly needs no introduction. Through the years, the MINI range has grown to include the likes of the Coupe, the Cabriolet, the all-new 5-door - the soon-to-be-replaced Countryman - the Paceman and the Clubman. Today, we're looking at that last one, with an emphasis on the Cooper S trim.
The first-generation Clubman, launched in 2007, was a 5-door reincarnation aimed at potential owners seeking more cargo and people-hauling capacity. But its asymmetrical door layout and peculiar styling made it probably the least favourite of the MINI family. This time around though, it has traditional doors and improved styling. But is it a better car? And does the increased wheelbase take away some MINI magic from the driver's seat? We find out!

DESIGN & AESTHETICS
For the most part, the 2016 MINI Clubman is a cute and lovable car like the sub-compact hatch it is based on. The oversized headlamps encircled in chrome - which lends it that signature bug-eyed look - the gaping air intakes, plastic wheel arches, chrome fuel filler cap and that truncated rear end are all characteristic and present. What the Clubman adds to this cute dumpling of a car is greater length - it is the longest MINI yet at 4,253mm. It also adds two proper traditional doors for the rear cabin, replacing the single rear hinged "suicide" door. You also have two barn-style or cupboard-style doors instead of a single hatch in the rear, making this not a 3-, 4- or 5-door but a 6-door hatchback. The other significant characteristic is the new set of horizontal rear lights that have lovely concentric detailing, instead of the usual vertical lamps - a first for a MINI.
The Cooper S model we drove came with a few visual enhancements as well, such as the hood scoop and larger air intakes, a grille that has the semblance of a honey-comb mesh and a sporty twin exhaust. This is definitely the trim to have!
Now, die-hard fans of the MINI may cringe at the notion of having a "big" MINI, but the regular folk would only rejoice at the added space for people and parcel. Our verdict on vanity is that the Clubman, even with its lengthy body, is as beautiful as any regular MINI.
Of course, as with all MINIs, customisation is imperative to set you apart from the regular Joe and, in that process, you may weave yourself quite a web, thanks to the elaborate options list. It begins with changing paint schemes - there are four solid colours and nine metallic ones to choose from. You can also colour the roof and mirrors, black, white or silver. And to keep you rolling in style, MINI provides seven different alloy designs, some 17" and some 18" in diameter, but all of which are chunky, sporty and elegant at the same time. And to complete the package, you can paste black or white racing stripes right down the middle of the bonnet to improve street cred.
For 2016, the Clubman's keyfob allows for smart access, but if you choose to click unlock manually, puddle lamps come on in the shape of the MINI logo beside the front doors - an interesting gimmick we have seen on both Mercedes and Hyundai, too.
At 1,441mm tall, it's still a car of small stature, but getting in isn't much of a hassle and, once inside, there is a good distance between you and the front passenger. Things are as not as intimate as before. The car's width has been increased to 1,800mm, making it also the widest MINI yet. Two 6ft tall adults will easily find space and comfort, courtesy the many seat adjustments. The other thing about the seats is that they come upholstered in blue diamond quilted leather, usually seen in very high-end luxury vehicles.
The increase in wheel base allows for the addition of two new doors and proper "2 + 1" seating, by which we mean that two adults and a child will easily find their comfort zone with ample amount of legroom, headroom and visibility out the windows. This car is actually built for a small family of three, four or even five.
The artistic and intriguing interior architecture of the beloved 3-door hatch has been retained on the dash and everywhere else. There is also an interesting array of toggle switches at the bottom of the centre console that includes a bright red starter button, which would excite anyone into pressing it.
Fortunately, MINI has rid itself of the dinner-plate size speedo that usurped the infotainment screen. It was an interesting visual, but it was too difficult to read the speed, which made you susceptible to speeding fines. Now, there are motorcycle-style circular gauges for road and engine speeds. As for the centre console, you still have a dinner-plate-like LED light ring that switches hues with the change in driving modes, around the 8.8" optional display.
All MINIs, the Clubman included, benefit from technologies borrowed from the corporate parent BMW, like the latest iDrive-inspired rotary controller that is now equipped for handwriting recognition.
The driver's seat is low-slung with a beautifully crafted, sporty, thick-rimmed steering wheel. The plastic-like creased leather that wrapped that wheel and lever in the predecessor has been abandoned for hide with a more supple texture. And it's not just that: the biggest improvement is that BMW has elevated overall quality - the feel of the soft touch plastics and trims are top drawer.

POWERTRAIN & PERFORMANCE
The Clubman, depending on the trim you choose, comes with a variety of purpose-built powertrains. The MINI gets the turbo 1.5L 3-cylinder, the Cooper models get the same engine with a power upgrade to 134bhp, and finally, you get the TwinPower Turbo 2L 4-cylinder in the Cooper S, like in our test car. The Cooper S now produces 189bhp at an easily accessible 5,000rpm, while maximum torque is rated at 280Nm and 300Nm with overboost available from 1,250 and up. It is an engine that deserves an accolade of some sort for its overall performance.
The MINI 3-door is built to be exciting, and when you buy that or any MINI variant, you expect the same zippy ride and go-kart handling, but the Clubman is a car that has had a reality check and has traded some fun to serve real life duties. It's still a great car for driving, but not necessarily a driver's car.
If you have an enthusiastic right hand and left foot, you can choose the 6-speed manual or you can go with the 8-speed Steptronic and that is what we think best suits this car's personality - and traffic. There is ample power across the tachometer, accompanied by raspy tones from the exhaust. It all sounds and feels like a bunch of angry mice are powering your car, in a very adrenalin-pumping way.
The S model with the auto gets to a 100km/h in 7.1 seconds and tops out at 228km/h, which is plenty good for any family man. There isn't an all-wheel drive ALL4 model available, which means that power is delivered to the front wheels, due to which there is some residue of torque steer, but nothing that detracts from the driving experience.
The Cooper S Clubman, with its hunkered down suspension, keeps traction high, especially through a corner, but the weight and size give away some grip and there is very mild body roll. We suspect the 3-door hatch to be faster on the circuit, but not by much. As for braking, the ventilated disc brakes perfectly complement the velocity and dynamics associated with this car, providing consistent and reliable performance.
The plus side of that long wheelbase is the slightly better ride quality. Now, it still doesn't let you glide over potholes like a luxury roller, but it is the best riding MINI available, one that lets you hold your beverages comfortably over bumps. Tyre noise can be of concern to some though, especially on highways.
Even with all this performance on tap, the MINI isn't as greedy for juice as you'd expect. The spec sheet states that you achieve around 6.3L/100km. Also, the larger 48L tank lets you go for longer on the road.
 
FEATURES & FUNCTIONALITY
Just as real estate developers like to maximise the amount of saleable square footage, the whole point of the Clubman is to be more accommodating and more practical. And that thought shines through from the design board down to the bodywork. So how much boot space does it have? Well, the 3-door hatch has 67L, the 5-door has 278L and the Clubman has a relatively massive 360L of luggage space. That's more than a 5-door Mazda 3. Also, it can be increased to a massive 1,250L by folding down the rear seats. These are massive numbers for a MINI. Do note that although the rear seats can be split folded, they are not flat to the floor. The two rear doors can not only be locked and unlocked but also opened up using the key fob.
BMW ownership means the Clubman comes with a host of state-of-the-art safety technologies, both active and passive. You have a camera-based active cruise control and collision control, pedestrian warning, high beam assist and road sign detection that can read speed limits. Some people have a fear of owning a small car due to safety concerns, but the Euro NCAP has rated it four stars for frontal crash testing.
The optional Harman/Kardon 10-speaker surround sound system is a good musical unit that plays near A-grade sounds, be it via the USB port or AUX-in. As for the dual-zone climate control, we weren't too fond of the placement of the A/C vents and the Dubai summers can put the system to test, but it worked sufficiently well, even with the sun directly over our heads.

VERDICT
The 2016 MINI Clubman is a 6-door hatchback that is 90 per cent successful in replicating the 3-door MINI's famed attributes, like its charming bug-eyed exterior, zippy drive and go-kart-like handling - especially in the Cooper S trim - while being almost twice as practical as some of its siblings.
This is the MINI for the one who has grown up, but hasn't grown old yet.

• On The Road