Beware, your kids may face online bullying in Dubai

Bullying is still happening and with today's technological generation in full swing, the end-of-day school bell no longer means the end of bullying for that day, as cyber bullying is now rife.

Schools in Dubai may have adopted a zero-tolerance approach to bullying following the introduction of the Knowledge and Human Development Authority's (KHDA) parents-school contract this year, but it has not equated to zero-incidences.
Bullying is still happening and with today's technological generation in full swing, the end-of-day school bell no longer means the end of bullying for that day, as cyber bullying is now rife.
In a survey conducted by the International Journal of Preventive Medicine Research of the American Institute of Science last year, a study of 1,054 students in the UAE showed that 40 per cent had been victims of bullying. And of that number, 85 per cent of cases occurred on school campuses.
In a country with over 200 nationalities, with the expatriate population outnumbering UAE citizens, does this contribute to incidences of bullying?
According to Sara Powell, art psychotherapist at Art Therapy International Centre (ATIC) Dubai, it can. "If a child has  had difficulties with relocation, being in a new environment they can, at times, be susceptible to being bullied, not fitting in or being able to identify with the expatriate culture."
Expatriate culture, she added, being different in their home country automatically makes the child an outsider for that particular transition. But what is it that makes bullies, bully? "Many times, children who are bullies have suffered some form of abuse in their life. It's multi-generational and it's a cycle which needs to be broken. We must remember that children who are bullies also need help."
Typically, Powell said, these children want to show their dominance over other children and this is fed by admiration by their schoolmates. And as a result, they often have trouble controlling both their actions, impulses and their emotions.
"However, many children who bully others want to receive affection/attention and acknowledgment, their need may be disproportionate and they turn to picking on other kids."
What is scary is the fact that despite the education authority's efforts at stamping out bullying, the ATIC is seeing a "frightening number" of children and adolescents being bullied in the community.
And many are victims of cyber bullying.
Cyber bullying can be extremely devastating, especially within a conservative community as it can bring shame and embarrassment. "And this is what prevents many from communicating online attacks."
As a result, suicidal ideation, withdrawal, acute anxiety, depression, and self-harm are some of the signs which are witnessed in these victims.
Although there are services and options to help children out here, anti-bullying school programmes are not enough, Powell said.
"It is a community effort; schools and specialist mental health practitioners need to collectively work together to manage this in keeping with UAE laws."
 Tips for parents to save their children from bullying
> Learn more about how your child is feeling: Empathise with your child. Creative strategies and activities can encourage bonding and help your child open up and you may learn about the source of the issue.
> Look at the home environment and outside: Does it influence behaviour? As well as peer relationships, they may be struggling to fit in at school or develop relationships with others.
> Talk to your child about social norms: Explain how some comments and behaviours can hurt others. Encourage your child to see things from others' perspective.
> Help your child manage stress with positive ways: Encourage them that it is okay to share how they feel by talking or using creative arts music or sports to help dissipate and express emotions.
> Look at one's own stress: Investigate whether your own stress may be affecting your child or creating an unstable work environment. Encourage activities such as nature trips or playing or looking after a pet.
> Set limits with technology: Monitor the amount of time they spend on computers, e-mail, TV and video games. Studies show that too much can lead to aggressive behaviour, negative attitudes and reduction in empathy.
> Be consistent with boundaries: Make sure your child understands your rules and punishments. Boundaries and discipline can help the child feel secure
(Compiled for Khaleej Times by Dubai therapist Andrew Wright)
 kelly@khaleejtimes.com 

• Dubai